When I first saw the poster for this stage show during our recent trip to Boston – more on that coming soon by the way – I have to admit I was somewhat taken aback. I figured this was going to be some sort of monstrous, tell-all, behind-the-scenes gossip-fest (how many hyphens is it safe to use in one sentence, by the way?) about the two leads’ time on the set of Dynasty.
What with the recent batch of behind-the-scenes TV movies on Charlie’s Angels, Three’s Company, and (yes) Dynasty, I guess I was getting cynical about former starlets (like Joyce DeWitt) making a little extra cash by dishing the dirt on their former colleagues. (And you know, I’m all for it, even if I pretend to be offended by the immorality of telling tales out of school. In truth, I’m hoping there are more of these TV movies in the works. I mean, who wouldn’t want to know the gritty details about the ill-fated cast of Diff’rent Strokes, or what sort of pharmaceuticals Charlotte Rae was popping during her stint on The Facts of Life – no one can play wired like that without being hopped up on something, I don’t care what you say!)
Anyway, that’s not what it’s about at all. Turns out that (and here’s a synopsis from the Wang Center for the Performing Arts website) LEGENDS! centers on two somewhat desperate and waning movie stars named Sylvia (played by Joan Collins) and Leatrice (played by Linda Evans). Both actresses are courted by an unscrupulous young producer to star together in a Broadway show, despite the fact that they have hated each other for decades. He convinces both ladies to go along by misleading them into believing that they will be starring in the show with Paul Newman. This hilarious set-up provides the background for the full-blown comic confrontation between these two divas and the surprising and hilarious resolution, played to the hilt by the two stars that the world will know as “rivals to the death” from the internationally acclaimed television series “Dynasty”.
Sounds kind of fun, doesn’t it? Makes me wish I could get a chance to see it. I think it’s headed for Broadway (or maybe it’s already there) and, if it’s a hit, it might just give Joan and Linda their careers back – well, Linda especially. While Joan seems to be getting some work, Linda’s been absent from the limelight since her contract with Crystal Light (blech!) expired.
All that aside, even if the description sounds good, it’s hard to trust it. Based on the poster, you know the producers are willing to lie through their teeth to sell tickets. That poster has had more than a little work done on it, don’t you think? Hmmm? C’mon Joan, you can tell me. The make-up department can’t work that kind of miracle. You and Linda have had some airbrush work done, haven’t you?