Neither of us has been to many weddings. Not sure why – maybe we only know non-committal people – but that’s how it is. As a result, the only things we knew about bachelor parties was what we had gleaned from Hollywood. We knew strippers had to  be involved at some point, but other than that we were pretty clueless.

So when we got around to planning our friend’s stag, we were a bit out of our depth. We’d planned parties before, but this needed to be more of a multi-location series of events. We were both a bit nervous once Saturday came around and we got into the thick of it – but we needn’t have worried. It came off beautifully.


Part 1 – Surprise Event

Our research told us that we needed to do something that the groom wasn’t expecting, so we racked our brains to find just the right thing. Junkii was stellar, coming up with laser tag, paint ball, a day at the spa, the casino, white water rafting, waterslides, and an aerial adventure just to name a few. But I liked his suggestion of wall climbing best of all – and we knew none of us had ever tried it before.


So we told the groom to be at our place with gym clothes at 1pm, and off we went to the Coyote Rock Gym. They gave us all a few lessons on how to harness ourselves and how to belay (i.e. make sure the climber doesn’t fall). We each climbed the practice wall twice and we each belayed for a climber twice – then we were set free to explore the rest of the gym!



Which was great, but after just a few more climbs we all found that our gripping strength was starting to fade. It wasn’t long before we had to pack it in. Still, we managed to climb for the better part of two hours, and it’s definitely something Junkii and I will go back to. We just have to wait until our forearms stop hurting.


And of course the groom had fun and was surprised – so we achieved our goals! 

Part 2 – Drink

We then headed home to our pad and everyone had showers and enjoyed a beer or two. We got a chance to chill out a bit and then, after about an hour, it was on to…


Part 3 – Dinner

We drove out to Kanata for dinner -  a big thank you to both Junkii and Stephen for staying sober. Yes, we hear you saying, “Kanata?!” but you’ll see why shortly.


We went to Moxie’s Classic Grill, which is a beautiful space with pretty good food for a chain. But of course the main reason we went was because all the waitresses are actually hired as models. So the groom was assured of some eye candy while he ate. It’s kind of like an upscale Hooters in that way. The waitresses are all well dressed though, and the décor is nicer.


Part 4 – Drink

Of course drinks were part of dinner, as well as part of the next event…


Part 5 – Roller Derby!

None of us had ever been before, and no one knew the rules, but turns out you didn’t need to. Everything was explained before the bout started.



Our team – the Rideau Valley Slaughter Daughters – were hosting a team from Vermont in this, their last home game of the season. The timing couldn’t have been better – scheduling their last game for the night of the bachelor party! We arrived with 30 minutes to spare, so we'd have time to grab some beers, and took our seats for a quick demonstration about how the game is played.


It’s such a fun sport – and quick. The two 30 minute periods go by in a flash, and they’re separated by a break to give us time to drink more.


We left about 20 minutes before the end, but the Slaughter Daughters were creaming the Vermont  team. So there was no chance of a comeback. We’ll be back next season for sure. So fun.

Here's a quick video of part of the match.


Part 6 – Drink (you see a trend yet?)

Repeat step 2, but without showers and exchanging beer for martinis.


We were supposed to go bar hopping at this point, but the groom preferred to just relax at our place for a bit. So we stayed there until it was time for the finale…


Part 7 – Strippers!

The evening ended in the Market at the BareFax Gentleman’s Club. I'm serious – it's actually called a gentleman's club. Like you'll walk inside to see dapper, upper-class fops with top hats and monocles sitting in lounge chairs and enjoying a snifter of brandy.

Okay, I’m not gonna get into any details here about what you WILL find inside – some things are best kept private – but suffice it to say we closed the club and even hung around on the street chatting afterwards.


The day was perfectly timed. We never felt rushed. The groom had a fantastic time – as did we all – and . we only regretted it slightly the next day when the headaches set in. Let’s just say we didn’t over-exert ourselves on Sunday.

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5 responses »

  1. Looks like you had a night! I have to say Im a bit releived because I honestly thought you all were doing the roller skating….and I was really paniced that you joined a crew called the Slaughter Daughters…..Im glad you were just watching. Sounds like a lot of fun.

  2. Hmmm. Maybe I should change it from "Our team – the RV Slaughter Daughters…" to "The team we were cheering for…"Didn't mean to scare you 🙂

  3. margotinto says:

    You know, I'd have an easier time believing you guys joined a roller derby team than believing that you actually went to Bare Fax. That means…you saw….wow.

  4. I have a history of going to that type of strip club. I should really write it up. Maybe I'll make that tomorrow's post.

  5. margotinto says:

    Um, ya, that one needs to be explained. You might want to limit it to neighbourhood, tho.
    I've been to Bare Fax once, but it was because I had a roommate who thought she had a Marxist-Feminist analysis worked out on burlesque dancing. We basically went to the "Gentlemen's Club" to call her on her BS. Oh, and it was my birthday.

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